The Bad Guys

Yesterday Ben was a small-time criminal fleecing New York's upper class. Today he has a new face, a new name, and a new world to navigate — and he thinks he might be able to use his skills in disarmament and deception to actually help people this time. Maybe. Watching a medieval city guard fend off a ten-meter sentient slime blob crawling up from the sewers makes him reconsider his life choices. Tomorrow he needs to rescue a girl, steal a crown, join a guild, and — most importantly — convince an innkeeper to make a decent bacon and cheese omelette.

Clyde Hatchett still has a day job scraping mud out of monster pits, his "thieves' guild" is more concerned with baking cookies than protecting him, and he keeps accumulating awkward roommates. He also has a mimic by his shower and a supposedly-tame grimeling in his closet. Despite all the annoyances and death threats, Clyde finds himself at the center of a massive conspiracy to kill the Emperor — and he's the only one with proof that could save the man and take down a network of corrupt nobles, evil slavers, and power-hungry despots.

Clyde is the last surviving member of the Biscuit's Union — and the guild has just handed him a quest: recruit eight members in good standing within one week or the guild dies. In order for any of his work to matter, for any of the numerous deaths he's gone through to count, Clyde has to keep the guild going. Seven days, eight guild members, and countless problems await.

Clyde Hatchett and the rest of Skull and Thrones must play their cards right — otherwise their newly-formed guild will fall in a war with the Iron Silents, overpowered immortals fond of spawn-camping and anything that puts them ahead. To keep his dreams alive and his newfound family safe, Clyde is committed to do whatever it takes, throwing magic, his ties to the prince, and even a few kobolds at the problem.

Kidnapped and sent sailing by his own girlfriend, Clyde Hatchett finds himself on a seaside mission far from Glaton, desperate to find the only mage capable of freeing him from the corpse-king taking over his body. Along the way, he also has to rescue his companion's sister from marrying a murderous slave owner. His crew consists of a libertine swordsman who keeps getting arrested, a mohawked captain whose crew is perpetually on the brink of mutiny, a salty old seadog who is very nice, and a mimic named Hellion. Oh, and mermaids.

Clyde Hatchett has known about the corpse-king slowly trying to take over his body for a while — and his entire left hand is starting to look like it belongs to the Crypt-Keeper. It's time to deal with it. But Gloomguard, where the mage he needs lives, operates on a completely different plane than anywhere else. Everyone is out for themselves and there are no favors. To even speak with the mage, Clyde must embark on a series of preposterous quests he doesn't have time for and isn't guaranteed to survive.

Clyde continues his adventures on the road back to Glaton — by way of the City of Night, a mysterious coastal detour in Furtaxo, and whatever other complications the world can throw at him.

Now a level-4 nobody, Clyde Hatchett is on a seemingly endless quest to return to his former life in Glaton. Standing in his way: Carchedonians who hate the Empire, a death cult, a traitorous group member, and a mythical city that most likely doesn't even exist. Clyde has reached the edge of the known world — and that's exactly where the adventure begins.

Clyde and company have finally reached the City of Darkness — which turns out to actually exist. One small problem: anyone who sets foot on the island immediately disappears. Ceases to exist. Poof. To complete the quest, Clyde needs to figure out how to enter the city and steal the crown jewels without getting stuck there forever. It's a dark, corrupt place, and the game rules he's gotten so good at bending don't seem to apply.

Clyde Hatchett, Glaton's prodigal son, is finally home — though nobody recognizes him in his new body. The Senate is heating up with nobles vying for the throne, more gangs and monsters than ever threaten the streets, and everyone in Old Town seems to expect Clyde to have all the answers. Political intrigue, grotesque battles, and old feelings converge as Clyde tries to figure out his next move.

Clyde Hatchett finds himself wrongfully imprisoned, accused of striking the princess. With a death sentence hanging over him and time running out, his only hope lies in completing a series of impossible quests — because in Glaton, being innocent isn't enough to save your neck, especially when you owe people favors. As the election for Emperor draws near, Clyde discovers that the line between friend and foe is as thin as the blanket on his prison bed.